April 2002

Our Children have Dreams. Do You Have Time?

Rarely, if ever, does one meet parents who wish for their children to fail. Perhaps such parents exist. However, I am yet to meet them; neither do I wish to. The other side of the coin is the parents who unknowingly diminish their children's chances for success. Herein lies the dilemma.

As Nigerian-American parents we love our children and wish for them to succeed. We also know how important success in school is and what that means in terms of being able to compete and to contribute meaningfully in a global economy, yet often we are sidetracked by the many challenges we face and the many distractions we encounter living in the United States.

The current trend of high-stakes testing in schools in the United States is fueled by the need to meet the demands of the market economy. Essentially schooling/education is being defined by the needs of the workplace and high-stakes testing is the tool being used to separate those who are deemed "successful" from those who are not. The question being asked is, "How can you fit into the work force when you get out of school so that you can promote economic growth for the country?" There seems to be little consideration for whether the test scores are evidence of a truly well-prepared future worker or a future responsible participant in society.

Although high-stakes testing may appear to make sense at first glance, a closer look causes one to question what this means for those children who do not, for whatever reason, pass the tests being used to determine who is "useful" in the future workforce and who is not. There is already much evidence out there about which children are more or less likely to succeed in school. The achievement gap between different races is unquestionable and extensively documented. Poverty is another factor being looked at closely. Nigerians and many other people of the world know that the effects of poverty can indeed be devastating. However, neither poverty nor high test scores is a sole determinant of success in life!

Success in school in the United States is very often dependent on having good command or understanding of the English language in its standard form coupled with strong parental involvement in the education process. Many immigrant families do not fall in the category of people with these credentials.

A significant number of immigrant parents work extensive hours to keep body and soul together (even when they are professionals), they do not sound "American" and definitely interpret and understand American English and its nuances from the perspective of their own cultural background and through their own cultural filters.

What does this mean for your child? This is a question with plural answers. It may mean that your child will be one of those who "succeeds" inspite of it all. It more often may mean that your child will not meet the requirements of the tests and may be labeled as having difficulty learning rather than being viewed as misunderstood and confused.

What can you do as a parent? Education is very political. You may elect to get involved in one of the many parent, teacher, or community activist groups already formed to work to influence legislation related to education. If this approach is too big a step for you to take, begin with yourself. Make a conscious effort to improve your command of the English language. Many Americans similarly struggle with standard English. Being proficient at a language other than your own does not mean that you have sold out to the other culture. You can be proficient at many languages. This can be of great benefit to you. Remember, language is a tool for communication. Tools serve functions. Speak clearly so you can be understood. Clear precise speech will serve you well.

Rearrange that work schedule if possible. Make some time to get involved with what's going at your child's school, to keep up with your child's academic and social progress at school and to monitor homework in any way you can.

Even if you are not able to acquire the fluency and broad knowledge of the English language rapidly enough to become your child's best model for English language acquisition and you are not able to rearrange your work schedule to accommodate the numerous meetings that and "opportunities" active participation in your child's education, don't fret.

There is power in numbers! Join hands with other Nigerian-American parents and take turns going to meetings and following up on the progress of each other's children. Write a note to the school or the teacher ahead of time and let them know that a member of your parent group has your permission to check on your child's progress. Being informed can help you strategize so that your child is not left behind or lost during this "testing craze".

Some of us attended boarding schools in Nigeria and elsewhere or lived with extended relatives and are familiar with having someone other than our parents keeping up with our progress. We must take the best of Nigerian parent networking and make it work for us, even if it is not the typical way business is conducted in schools in the United States. We must recognize that for this system of networking to be effective we must raise respectful children who honor all people. The adults who advocate for children in place of their parents must be as well respected as the parents themselves.

Our children are our hope and our future. Find time to make their dreams a reality!